January was spent in the spinal unit at Salisbury, as I mentioned before, the dark days suddenly got a lot brighter as I learnt how to cope with the bladder and bowel management of my injury, one highlight being when my children Harry and Stella came to visit and I had arranged to go to a local pub for lunch… they were so happy to see me all ready and to be going out!! The fun came when my daughter helped in in the toilet and let’s just say we wet ourselves laughing as I only had an accident!! A SHART!!! As Harry put it… well this will always be a happy memory, as Stella helped me she too became covered…. Can you imagine the chaos in the toilet??!!!
The local pub was not that local as Dads sat nav took us the long way round and we ended up on an airstrip runway!!! Well nearly!! The kids screaming where are we?? And laughing at the situation!! It was pouring down with rain when we eventual arrived at the pub… in our haste rushing, I nearly ended up in the flower bed!!! Soaked! When we got into the bar it was rammed, I felt like Jesus parting the red sea!! Everybody moved and I got to the front shouting excuse me excuse me people say oh sorry and look at the wheel chair and moved out of the way…( I can see how this could become an advantage), Stella said “how you going to get served as they can’t see you “ I said yes Stella but they can hear me!!! And SHOUTED “a DOUBLE G&T PLEASE!!!!” Oh how I needed that drink that day.
Lots of amazing friends visited me over this month and we made plans as to how I would manage back home, well when you are as lucky as I am to have such wonderful friends and family I knew it was all going to be possible. The physio and hydro therapy helped to get me stronger and the home visit I attended on the 25th January was the start of things to come. I was told patients don’t attend on the home assessment. I told them I am…No one is going to my house making decisions about my home and my family on my behalf thank you! Obviously I attended and we went from there.
At the end of the month Harry and Stella came to stay in the Flat at the hospital, we had an amazing weekend, shopping eating, cooking together just like old times and they were so accepting of my needs and condition. The stay in the flat was another tick in the box closer to being discharged home…. I was so proud of Harry and Stella; they amaze me I love them so much, they are my inspiration to keep going.
February came and went with
me saying good bye to Harry as he went on a school skiing trip and Stella came
to stay a few days with me in hospital. Harry loved the trip and Stella got to
spend much needed time with me. We went swimming together, raced up the pool
and obviously I still won! We spent some time at Wilton RDA, www.rdawilton.co.uk we went out
shopping together and she joined in my physiotherapy and rehab. All of which was
invaluable for Stella. We went to a garden party at the spinal charity
Horacio’s garden, a place where I use to go to find myself when times were
difficult in the early days, surrounded by new friends and family it was most
enjoyable, raising money for an amazing charity.
February also saw me have a
coil fitted so I could manage my monthly cycle and a meeting with James from
Pearce brothers to fit and order my wheel chair, which was paid for by the
incredible generosity from family and friends on a just giving page which was
set up following my accident. A massive thank you to all who donated towards
this as my wheelchair has become a part of me and the relationship I have built
with Pearce brothers has been surprising!!!! (More of this later).www.pearcebrosmobility.co.uk
I had a goal planning
meeting later in February and an overnight stay at home which I managed to
accomplish and the discharge date was set for the end of Feb!!! Yippee I
couldn’t wait. But I knew it wasn’t going to be easy. So on February 25th
2016 after 20 weeks in hospital, breaking my back and sustaining a life
changing spinal injury and being left paralyzed from the waist down I went
home.
March was a busy month,
establishing a new routine, sleeping in my lounge and trying to learn how to
live on the outside of the bubble id been in was harder than I ever though
imaginable. March the 4th was the band night/auction fund raiser,
which suddenly took off and the original venue had to be scrapped in view of a
larger one as the tickets sold like hot cakes it was the most amazing night…
Drinking in charge of a wheelchair is not advised!!! But of what I can remember
it was an incredible night with loads of money raised towards my home adaptions.
This month also showed who
of my friends I can truly rely on!! It comes to something when you ask your
friends to shave your legs and wash your hair… The yard team were fantastic and
bought me a shower chair,www.hickscommonlivery.co.uk Nick and Stuart made me a ramp to get up into the
yard, Jim made a ramp so I could get into the tearoom and having coffee and
watching Stella ride, brought tears to my eyes to think that I was back doing
the things I enjoyed with special people.
I started attending physiotherapy
and going to the MS centre in Bradly stoke www.mstherapybristol.org.uk where I stood in the frames and
realised I was rubbish at wii tennis!! I met the team at Pauls place a local
charity who are fantastic. www.paulsplace.org.uk I was set up with a peer support from Backup spinal
charity and spent many an hour chatting to Reg who help support me through
some difficult challenges now I was back home.
On 30th march I
went back to Salisbury as I had been chosen to represent the unit in the annual
Spinal games competition at Stoke Mandeville stadium in April, (obviously they
saw I had potential!!! Ha ha….) Well the evening return and staying in the flat
ended up in a very drunken night!! Bloody Mark and the never ending glass of
wine... So embarrassing doing the recycling as I had only been there one night…
There had to be a first time of falling out your chair drunk as a skunk, and
that night was it. What a mess I was the next day, and this was when I met all
the other team members who I would be joining for a week in April representing Salisbury
spinal unit. This is when I got the nick name of Ill shine in the pool!!! What
a laugh…. After this week was when I had my first really serious urine
infection… omg I was so ill… hallucinating and no balance what so ever, very
scary… This is when your glad you know the medical profession and have friends
so that when out of hours you could still get some antibiotics into your
system. Probably as a result from all the alcohol the previous week. Note self-Drinking and seeing Mark is bad for my health!!!! (Love you really Mark)
During April I attended the
Spinal games with 7 others, who had also been injured in the last 12 months,
this opportunity opened up so many doors and friendships that has been
invaluable. As a team we took part in various sports against about 11 other
spinal centres. We had the most amazing support and team bond that this
experience will stay with me forever. I met some amazing individuals that were
also learning to come to terms with their injury/condition. Sometimes it was
hard for me not to fall back into my nursing role and want to help/look after
some individuals. But as a group we had a right blast… the highlight of the
week was my family coming to watch and support me and the dinner on the last
night… Overall we came 2nd out of 12 units… not a bad outcome and a
massive experience for all involved. I absolutely loved it.
Towards the end of the month
I took my driving assessment, as I thought it was about time I gave my liver a
rest... when you’re driven everywhere
there is no excuse not to have a cheeky drink!! But I was ready to give driving
a go. Let’s just say the instructor must have balls of steel... my driving with
hand controls was mental. It was a start and could only improve. I joked with
the kids and told them I bought a mobility scooter, they were mortified.
On the 28th April
I attended a sports function at Ashton Gate to promote wheelchair rugby and
caught up with a friend who I had met at Stoke games!! Paul from GB wheelchair
rugby. He was excited as they are trying to establish a Bristol team. Obviously
I would love to go to the training and games as it’s a great cardio exercise,
and I could do with losing a few pounds… The TV cameras were there and I was on
points west!!! Ha ha… a star in the making…..
Being home and establishing
a new routine has been amazing, lots of lovely evenings with friends, meals out
and catching up and the support I’ve received is fantastic.
May saw me attend with my
great friend Sue Edward Badminton Horse Trials, what an achievement, sue worked
really hard sorting out the travel arrangements and borrowing me a mobility
scooter… I was in my element. Pimms in the sun, watching the horses from the
premier enclosure and shopping!!! What more could I ask for.
Behind the scenes I was
working very hard with my Occupational therapist, by this time I had gone
through two and was now being dealt with
by a senior OT called Claire who is so realistic and empathetic its fab, she
gets it!!! I had a meeting about a stair lift, designs by building control and
ideas about how they want me to manage. I had other ideas and kept on working
with the team till I could prove the importance of my ideas for me and my
family… I won them over and we went for more meetings, all supported by my
manager and Tony from the SIA (spinal injuries association).
On 22nd May was a
dressage event organised by Severn vale riding club and Sue Porch to help raise
funds for my home adaptions. Stella and Julie entered and did really well, Stella
won her class and both qualified for the championships. Well done both, the day
was well organised and I met loads of riding club members who supported me
through the last 8 months.
One of the most exciting
things that happened that day was that my friend and trainer Beth Miller
offered me her horse Super Flynn to ride again as a para horse... I was over
the moon, to have this chance. I can’t thank Beth enough for this opportunity.
A trip to Bristol RDA with my friend Michelle and my physiotherapist, which I have
previously mentioned was a huge success or not and opened the doors to other
things or shut doors! All of which I will tell you about later.
The end of the month
brought illness again with bladder complications and things were starting to
get me down, a trip back to Salisbury hospital again to see the urology team,
was going to mean I needed surgery later in the year and was on the waiting
list. Oh no not what I wanted, but I couldn’t carry on the way things were
going, I was fed right up!!! Bloody bladder
June brought an exciting venture;
I had decided to go and train on an aesthetics course, giving botulinum toxin
and dermal fillers. Initially this was going to just be for me, friends and
acquaintances… but I was very interested in setting up a small business my
friend Amy helped me with some designs and I have called the business “ROLE
MODEL AESTHETICS” ….. I am so excited about the future for this small business,
as it’s something I am passionate about. The opportunity came about to work the
business from my friends Salon Aura Retreat….www.auraretreat.co.uk This is going to open up a huge
chance for me to establish a small business close to where I live in a very
friendly special environment. I met some wonderful helpful medics while doing
this venture and hopefully this will flourish into better connections as I am
starting to realise it’s not what you know it’s Who you know.
The rest of the month
continued with more, physiotherapy personal training sessions now becoming a regular
thing, at Frampton Fitness and I joined the gym in yate at the sports centre.
Gym, gym, and more gym I decided that's what I need
.
July brought a few cricket
matches for Harry, which is a civilised evening watching the game, having a
glass of wine and catching up with friends, made even better with a win!!! I
collected my new car a lovely BMW … and trip to Yorkshire, all of which if you know me didn’t
go without commotion, let’s just say a normal 3.5 hour journey turned into a 9
hour journey and involved being towed off the M6 in rush hour on a Friday
night, it’s all life skills and learning to be a paraplegic in difficult
situations there are lots of firsts. But I must say I don’t want me and my
family put in this situation again. A letter to Motability and the car adaption
company will be sent…..
We had the most enjoyable
weekend catching up with family in Yorkshire, we are so lucky to have such a
close bond, even though we live such a long way away. Special times. The
organised collection of my new Batec adaption was now put on hold as we didn’t
make it to Widness to collect it. They have said they will deliver it to my
house, fantastic result, can’t wait for that.
The following week I
received delivery of the Batec electric adaption that a charity called
“Friends of Huck” www.friendsofhuck.co.uk has donated. It is the most amazing piece of kit that fixes
on to my wheelchair to make it like an electric off road chair, I can walk the
dog, go across the fields and round the yard. I can’t thank Friends of Huck enough;
they have given me my outdoor life back. Alfie my dog loves it, he sits on my knee and rides
round, but it enables me to walk him and most of all play ball with him which
he absolutely loves. When things are settled, we will have to do something for
these smaller charities as they have helped no end my quality of life. We all attended
a charity dog and horse show to help raise money for the charity and dressed
up… fun was had by all.
More physiotherapy and gym sessions was also required to find my core and I realised if
I was to stand any chance of getting back on the horse I need to be able to sit
up unaided!!! This was going to be hard! Blood, sweat and tears and a lot of
hard work is called for.
August meant hen dos, a
wedding and an operation. My special friends were getting married and I had
being asked to be their Matron of honour, I was over the moon and so happy for
them, but you guessed it… my letter for an operation came and I was to spend
most of august in hospital again, hopefully this time improving my quality of
health. I missed the wedding and couldn’t be matron of honour...
I had to go to Salisbury
hospital for my operation, and spent another two weeks in rehab in Thornbury.
The ward and the staff were amazing, what a ;lovely place to be, they looked
after me really well and you can tell from the way the team worked they all
enjoyed working together on that ward, what a pleasure to be a patient there.
My mad friends came to me on
their wedding day as I couldn’t go to the wedding, trotting onto the ward in
their wedding dress and suit… they looked amazing, they brought me the wedding
bouquet... oh how I cried… so lovely, such special friends.
August brought birthdays for
Harry and Stella and another discharge home from hospital, more challenges to
overcome once home, but nothing I can’t cope with. When you’ve been to hell and
back, somethings now just seem so trivial. Once home more socialising and
catching up needs to be done and planning a holiday for my birthday next month,
wow time is flying by…. I now have a date for the work to start on my house, a
wet room, wider landing area and widening the hall way. JMP construction www.fmb.org.ukhas
won the tender for work to be completed by the South glos council so the work
will begin in September. Stella is having some riding lessons and I get to
watch her ride Flynn! The horse that I have been offered, to start my para
riding on. It’s getting exciting.
September now, some
disappointment as my surgery I had on my bladder doesn’t seem to have been as
effective as I had hoped; I am still suffering with . One
of the other big events to look forward to is the Masquerade Ball. The date has
been booked for 4th February 2017. We have 350 tickets to sell and
it will be held at The Grand Hotel Bristol. Nearly all the family from
Yorkshire will be attending and have booked rooms at the hotel, all to help
raise funds for the house alterations. Nearly all the family from Yorkshire
will be attending and have booked rooms at the hotel, all to help raise funds
for the house alterations.
Many other friends have
donated funds from charity events, Hannah and her husband ran the Bristol 10k,
Sue and Catharine ran the great north run, there was a virtual race, organised
and swimming all to help towards getting my house adapted.
I had an architect draw up some
plans and submitted them to the council for planning application for the
downstairs and need to wait to see if the plans get past, I will need to get
some builders give me some quotes once the plans and building regulations have
been passed.
Most of September started as
normal for this time of year, A new school year for Harry and Stella. Harry
going into year 11...GCSE year, and Stella started year 9. Harry has started
the season for Rugby, for Frampton Cotterell RFC. He is playing well and
enjoying the game. Stella is continuing her riding and enjoying every minute of
it.
I am in the process of
employing a PA to help me with jobs in and around the house, that I find difficult.
This will be a huge help to me, and I am sure I will be a good employer!!!
The 17th brings
another birthday, 43 this year… and a holiday to Spain for 5 days as a research
project.. The whole experience was made much more fun by the lovely girls who I
went with, Helen, Jacki, Alison, Vicky and Jo. Well let’s just say the hotel
was like faulty towers. When the hotel said they are wheelchair friendly that
was very subjective. I survived, made my virgin flight as a para and drank so
many cocktails and even sunbathed and went swimming in the pool (which was
bloody freezing) and set off spasm in my legs… well it could have been the
alcohol or cocktails!!!!
Back home for a rest and the
work started on the house, so not much rest for me. Builders, electricians and
decorators in the house from 8.30am… well some days more like 12.30 and some
days not at all… less said about this the better, work was happening slowly,
but at least it was happening. The possibility of a shower in my own home is
getting nearer.
October was another wedding,
this time my Friend and Trainer Beth. She married her partner Lee on a lovely
sunny day at Old Sodbury Church, and had a wonderful do at the Tythe barn
Tetbury. www.gtb.co.ukThanks for inviting us to share your special day!! Another tick in the
box and challenge for me. Cobbles/stones/ramps and hills, ha ha.
More socialising and
building continued this month and a flurry of phone calls and emails to and
from the RDA as I was now getting fed up with the knock backs and lack of
support from the RDA. So I did what I do best and went right to the top and
wrote a letter. I was put in touch with the Head of Therapy in Warwick, I
wanted a second opinion. Why can I not ride at the RDA??? Am I too disabled, if this is the case its
cause for discrimination?? So I want this to be investigated. I got my wish and
my case was discussed at the annual conference for the RDA. I have been
liaising with some of the new contacts I have made, as I don’t feel it’s very
fair as some other area RDA’s have para riders, all I want to do is ride the
simulator. Shear grit and determination will be my main aim.
Later in the month I joined
British Dressage (BD) www.britishdressage.co.uk as a quest member, as advised by the south west region
team. I attended am amazing training day Nr Westonburt and the venue blew me
away. The support team has started to form and consisted today of Beth, Julie
and Stella. We were spectators and the opportunities for networking and
research have been invaluable.. Today we realised we don’t need the RDA!! We just
need to be self-sufficient. I just need to get on unaided, so that I can attend
venues that don’t have a hoist. I was
shown where to find all the forms and downloaded them from the internet, I was
doing lots of ground work and the help and support I am being shown from
British Dressage para riding has been phenomenal. I now know the direction I
want to go in. so exciting.
So with forms filled in and
in hand I attended a surgery appointment at the beginning of November to get
the letters/form stamped and signed by my doctor. Once photocopied (keep the
evidence!!) I posted it to British dressage, an application for assessment for
classification, an official level to ride at. That’s it, now I wait.
More building work, the wet
room is now completed, and the work on the landing and decorating is full steam
ahead. I have said I need to be upstairs for Christmas. Still no stair lift or
access upstairs but we are working towards a date early December for this A couple of building companies have been to look at the house, and have
taken plans, which is good news. More sessions at the gym with my PT
instructor Seona, who is now getting quite good at pretending to be a horse and
neighing when I am bouncing on the gym ball. (Apparently it will all help to
engage my core in 2017 when I actually get back on top)
Also November saw more
training sessions in Bristol for wheelchair rugby. The funding is now been
submitted for 4 wheelchairs of the teams own so we will be able to train
weekly, this will be fantastic for cardio!! Exercise and will help keep me fit
and strong. The team name so far is called the Bristol Bears, if no one can
come up with anything better, but it seems to be gathering momentum and there
is talk of matches, team kit, etc.….. Just something else for me to do... at
the moment I am so busy I don’t know whether I am coming or going!
The end of the month saw
decorating and carpets going down, a charity called remap who I have been
working with, came to show designs how to get me in my hot tub, a new bed has
been delivered provided by Mark Davies injured riders fund (MDIRF) www.mdirf.co.uk and after
nearly 10 months of sleeping down stairs and showering up the road there is
light at the end of the tunnel. My PA started and we are preparing for the big
push to get me upstairs and out of the lounge for Christmas.
December saw the most
emotional and best Christmas present of all, I got my house back and access to
the kids!! Great for me, probably not for them… ha ha….Pearce brothers
installed the stair lift; I got to go upstairs for the first time in over
14months… emotional wasn’t the word.. I got to sleep in my new bed and had a Christmas
tree in my bedroom… I am the luckiest person in the world. To be here with my
family, we had Christmas presents and stockings and prosecco in bed….I couldn’t
have asked for anything else. One of my best Christmases ever.
With the encouragement from
Beth I started my para riding dream blog, which is going from strength to
strength and gathering moss like a rolling stone… my small business at Role model
aesthetics is also doing well and the reviews and return clients is proving
that. The gym continues to challenge me, but the challenge will be losing all
the extra pounds after Christmas. The wheelchair rugby team spent a great
complimentary day at the rugby, and the team building and banter is good..
Besides all these amazing things I also had confirmation that my application
for classification had been forwarded onto the panel at British para equestrian
classification at the National championships coordinator. This is amazing. I have a assessment by a consultant professor in Oxfordshire, as a second opinion fir my assessment to ride at the RDA.. so perhaps I am not too disabled to ride at the riding for the disabled after all.
I have persevered writing to
companies and researching how to mount super Flynn and have been successful in establishing
a hoist system they attach to the back of the horse lorry, we are looking forward
to working with Dolphin mobility www.dolphinlifts.co.uk in the New Year, to make this happen. As well
as all these amazing things I have managed to secure a sponsorship for help
with the para riding dream. Pearce brother’s mobility has agreed to sponsor me….
What amazing news!!!! Not only have they worked very hard providing me with equipment
that has made it possible for me to be as able and as independent as I have
become, but they have proved to be very kind and generous. A local firm that’s help
for me has been fantastic…. I can’t thank them enough, and look forward to
working more with the company in 2017.
Let’s just say this Christmas
and New Year has been the best ever as I look forward to what trials and
tribulations 2017 brings as I work towards getting back on top!!! First local
para dressage, then nationals and who knows where it might lead???. 2020 para Olympics??!!!!!
All the time I am requiring
businesses to sponsor the dream, so any help will be greatly received. Nothing
will be refused as all donations and help to get me on top will be considered…
Who’s coming with me???? Let’s begin the Journey into 2017!!!
